See? We know how to make ourselves sound “old” and “out of touch.” First, you address people as “kids.” Then, you just add the word “the” in front of “MySpace,” and voila! You’re a Golden Girl on a mission.
Now, as we were saying, wouldn’t this just look pretty on your “the MySpace?”
We think so too. We’ve got a whole mess o’ Super Deluxe skins (actually, just three) over at our MySpace page, free for the taking. So, please, take them.
That’s what you “kids” do anyways. Take, take, take.
God bless you, Devin Flynn. For you and only you and your Y’all So Stupid insanity understand that grillless teeth are old school teeth. And old school teeth wear Kangols and quote Boogie Down Productions. In fact, you made us so nostalgic for 1988, we’re rewatching “My Philosophy” on the hour and pining for the company of Fab 5 Freddy (who directed this video) and Yo! MTV Raps.
“What the fuck was that?”
“I almost had a seizure.”
“Wow! 2 bad acid makes me dismember the naighberhood [sic] animals.”
These are a typical batch of viewer comments posted on Devin Flynn’s Y’all So Stupid series. And they speak to the breakneck experience of watching one of Mr. Flynn’s shorts: a lot comes at you in a short amount of time. Before you can focus on the UFO taking a dump on a mountain, there’s already a brain-eating zombie crawling out of the ground, followed by a strobe-lit pair of eyeballs floating towards you in some weird K-hole tunnel. And then you laugh and wriggle around in your seat nervously before getting blasted with the next overwhelming image of insanity.
Sure, it’s “trippy” and “drug-induced” and it seems to make viewers want to shave their heads or whatever. But there’s also a lot of loving detail and brilliant imagery crammed into every frame of Y’all that can easily be overlooked. So, we decided to slow things down a bit, and go back through the past six episodes to pick out our favorite stills. Only the most visually arresting ones that could be framed and hung in a gallery without any mention of a Super Deluxe or the Internet or continuous play options. And on top of that, we bugged Devin to give us a word or two about each one. And he did.
Love the face on the pipe. Do you believe in Animism? Rastafarism?
Objects know. But you don’t know what they know. That’s what I think, you know what I’m saying? Furthermore, Haile Selassie I is roughly an anagram for “door stopper” in The Hall Of Mirrors in Versailles. And “rasta” is “door stopper” in patois (Doh-Ra-Sta-Pa).
In January, we launched a Website and since then, we’ve thrown a lot of shit against the proverbial wall. Some of it has stuck. Some of it hasn’t. Some of it has congealed into little fat deposits around our ankles.
And then there’s the stuff that is just really fucked up. And we mean that in the best possible way. Sort of. Here’s the list:
1. Curious Crackhead - Trick Or Treat
Have a happy ironically racist Halloween, everybody! Jason Ruiz completely snorted up the line between “funny cuz it’s true” and “you’re making everybody very uncomfortable” with this episode of Curious Crackhead. First off, Mr. Curious himself is a walking, talking super-mega-stereotype of a cocaine smoker: he’s black, he’s barefoot, his clothes are stained and ripped up, he’s got food and other little bits hanging off of his face and he’s always rubbing at himself. Then, there’s the ongoing premise: Curious likes to harass unwitting white people for various crap. In this Halloween installment, he begs and pleads for candy from a waspy homeowner, at one point beseeching him to “Taste the rainbow, nigger.” But what makes this one truly cringe-inducing is the final gag. Watch it for yourself and try not to murmur “Oh, no he didn’t” to yourself.
2. 9/11 Coin
The title “911 Coin” is kind of misleading. The narrator clearly states at the beginning that the “metal supply from the wreckage of the World Trade Center has been depleted by the previous” 9/11 Commemorative Coins. So, what exactly is Dutch West selling here? A Frankenstein creation steeped in the great American tradition of tragedy profiteering. The Ground Zero side of the “Freedom-Disaster Combo Coin” is believably fucked up enough. However, the bas relief of a black family stranded on a roof in Hurricane Katrina-ravaged New Orleans is from a whole other dimension of wack; one where George W. Bush just comes out and says, “Kanye was right. I really don’t care about black people.” But the real fucked up question is, would you buy this all-too-real monstrosity? That is, if it was real? You know, just to be ironic?
3. Disnutskin
If we told you this may be the most graphically explicit video on the site, would you get excited? Don’t. Unless you like watching David Neher play with his exposed ballsack. His buck teeth, jean shorts and shit-hacked haircut are equally disturbing, not to mention the fact all of this is taking place at a wake. And that’s just in the set-up. What follows is the ultimate tea bag joke writ like an eerily familiar nightmare: we’ve all been at a solemn gathering where some jackass does something that’s wildly inappropriate. We’ve also all witnessed how grown-ass men and women are reduced to acting like children the second somebody busts out the latest prop-heavy board-game or whatever. And we’ve all had a big, saggy set of nuts jiggle and shake into our open mouths before, right? Right. Oh, and don’t forget about the diarrhea guns.
4. Panda Porn
Psst. Wanna see something real freaky aaaaaaaand real stupid? How about a grown man in a panda bear costume jacking off? Or is that too 2006 for you? Well then, how about a grown man in a panda bear costume fucking a grown man in a giraffe costume eating the ass of a grown man in a panda costume sucking the dick of a grown man in a lion costume spanking a grown man in a dear costume felating a grown man in an alligator costume all the while a grown man in a lobster costume runs around fluffing everybody? Remarkably, that’s not even the most abjectly retarded thing in this video. That award goes to Roger Black (of Waco And Roger) who plays the role of Dr. Wang Chung–the squintiest, most richshaw-pullingest Asian stereotype since the phrase, “Ching chong wing wong.”
5. Y’all So Stupid #1
“Seizure inducing.” That’s always the go-to phrase around here to describe Devin Flynn’s animated series. But it’s this premiere episode that set the fucked-up bar on high. After all, when’s the last time you watched a crack vial slowly float through a bright, flashing K-hole tunnel? Or a giant Rasta head stuff a white cop into his weed pipe and smoke him? Or an unintelligible DMT elf pop up in what appears to be a human fat cell and babble something about “bubbles?” Hmm? The true art of Y’all’s fucked-up-ness is the way Devin makes every squiggly bit of weirdness seem oddly recognizable, like we’re all sharing in the same hallucinations brought on by huffing the same expensive art store supplies in back of the same Radio Shack outlet store.
6. Bender
There are two levels of fucked up-ness to this video, and they nearly cancel each other out. The first is the obvious message here: shamelessly crappy L.A. rapper loves drugs and alcohol. Oh yeah, and pussy, too!! Haha. Isn’t he crazy?? The other is the much more tepid reality of what’s really going on: Andre Legacy and his crew seem to be just a funky bunch of Jewfroed rich kids who got their start in Hollywood decadence because their parents are “in the biz.” Where’s the proof? Cisco Adler. He produced the track and appears in the video, and we all know why he’s “famous.” Still, all hatin’ aside, an opiate-dipped crack rock does sound like fun.
7. Hands Of God
This video series begets thy question, “What the fuck do puppets have to do with the teachings of Jesus Christ?” We have no answers, but the puppeteers do. Christ, they probably think God is going to personally thank each and every one of them when they get to heaven by shoving his fist up their respective asses and making them sing “I Want To Know You.” Alyson Levy of PFFR/Wondershowzen fame shot this seven-part documentary at a real-life Christian puppet camp, and the results are truly blessed. Once again, the pure, crystalized fucked-up-ness of reality trumps all. You just can’t make up shit like, “It’s always poor down there [Mexico]…it seems like there’s so many people that needs to be reached the Lord and puppets is one of the few things that are used.”
This blog is many things to not-so-many people. Among its functions, it acts as the antithesis–an antidote, if you will–to whatever’s cooking on the home page. For example, if the crass commercialization of those Walk Hard pop-up ads is getting to you, come to the blog where the only thing we advertise is our desperation. If there’s a new video on the home page that’s really funny, we try to post something completely unfunny here. And if a video premieres that’s so addictively intoxicating and disorienting–as is the case with today’s Y’all So Stupid–that you end up doing this, then let this blog be the “safe space” where you can come down in peace. Amongst friends and fellow visionaries. Kind of like a commune.
You may have noticed, Devin Flynn’s series for us has been gradually morphing into a more fully realized mindfuck with each new episode. Apparently, he moved somewhat recently from New York to L.A. where he now employs a cadre of animators and helper gnomes to jam as much shapeshifting weirdness as possible into each Y’all So Stupid. But that’s not to say that’s all he does. He’s plenty in-demand in the fun-time indie muzik circles, too (i.e. Erase Errata’s “Retreat, The Most Familiar,” Lightning Bolt/Wolf Eyes’ “Pick A Winner”). And then there’s this lil’ educational gem he did. It’s called How Do We Hear? and it’s his version of a children’s cartoon. The signature “drawn from an acid trip” style animation is the same, but the hallucinatory vice and crap eating that are his usual subject matters is replaced with a gentle and informative lesson on the intricacies of auditory perception. Now, how’s that for a warm blanket, Captain Trips?
There. I said it. And I don’t care.
I suppose it’s not the wisest idea to insult you, dear blog reader, who also happens to constitute this Web site’s audience. After all, a few choices words might be all it takes to completely alienate you and thousands of other viewers. And then, before you know it, you guys are all back to watching videos about bulls driving Toyotas or something HILARIOUS like that on lesser sites.
But seriuosly. Y’all So Stupid (#1):
Dr. Seuss was quoted as saying “’Seuss’ rhymes with ‘voice.’” So, in honor of Theodor Seuss Geisel’s birthday—as well as the 50th anniversary of the printing of his classic, The Cat in the Hat—I will refer to him from now on as Dr. Soice.
No, I won’t. That’s gay. And I don’t do gay things anymore.
OK. As for the Dr. Soice (there I go!), I think the majority of people think his books were cool when they were children. But lots of things were cool. Keys were cool, too, to us as babies. If you jingled them in front of my face, it kept me from shitting myself for a brief moment. I once spent a whole weekend humping the couch when I was 8. In high school, I used to think it was cool to huff gas with a dude named MC SUPREME JUSTICE. No shit. He had a fucking baseball cap with that stitched on the side. He also had a tattoo of the Cat in the Hat dribbling Saddam Hussein’s decapitated head above a banner that read, “We Didn’t Start The Fire.” So Damn InSane!
Dr. Seuss would have been 103 years old today if he hadn’t died in 1991 at age 87. Death is bad. But fortunately, death did save Theodor Seuss Geisel from one thing: the scarring effect of ever having to watch Mike Myers’ Cat in the Hat movie.
Just a whiff smells like the Lorax farted in your face, doesn’t it? I challenge anyone to sit through that trailer and not be filled with the urge to take a dump in Mike Myers’ hat before firmly jamming it back onto his self-satisfied head.
OK, now, why don’t you chase that with this little mystery abortion:
What is that? Is somebody in a Cat in the Hat raver hat going to get killed in a moment? What’s that music?? What’s going to happen?? Oh, nothing. A fat girl walks in the picture and then this appears at the end…
Now, please direct your attention to the gentleman standing third from the right, second from the left. Neatly sandwiched between our Cat in the Hat guy and Elvis. See him yet? You don’t?? Maybe I should address him by name: The Chocolate Witch?? The Wicked Burn Victim Of The West?? The Simmering Shit-Smeared, David Lynch Creature That Lives In The Alley Behind Denny’s in Mulholland Drive??”
Who the fuck would let that guy in the house?!? Seriously. He wouldn’t get past my front door. “No, dude. You’re going to freak everyone out. Seriously. People just want to get fucked up. They don’t want to deal with you looking like a Wiccan Shit-pile.” I bet the guy on the far left invited him. He looks like he’s heavy into black face and UB40.
So, I was going to try to write in Dr. Seuss’ anapestic tetrameter style of rhyme or something, but instead I’ve gotten off-course. You should watch this brand new Devin Flynn clip. The Doctor would have probably liked it. Or maybe not.
Devin Flynn presents Y’all So Stupid #2.
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