Man, I felt like I was straight trippin’ when I cracked open this morning’s newspaper. There was a story entitled, “Are you trippin’ over slang? Book keeps it real, fo’ shizzle.” It was all about an eight-page booklet that a county commissioner here has published called “Da Slang Thang: What Parents Need To Know.” Don’t know what “hydro” means, Mom? Check it! Can’t figure out what “flossin’” is, Dad? Then read up.
The paper also printed a lil’ informal quiz graphic that read:
Test your hipness. Guess the slang meaning of the following words:
1. Snowman
2. Trap
3. Hot
4. Grillz
5. Paper
6. Bangin’
7. Bananas
8. Celly
9. C.R.E.A.M.
10. Crib
Come on!! Those are so basic. I’ve known what “crib” has meant ever since MTV told me back in 2001. And I’ve been calling my coke dealer “snowman” since he sold me my first eight-ball in 10th grade. And I’m sure I’ve been using the term “bangin’” for one form of sexual perversion or another ever since I figured out how to masturbate.
Now, I don’t mean to brag, but I keep my ear to the street. Literally. Sometimes I play basketball with the neighborhood high schoolers and they end up knocking me down on the blacktop a lot. But I have to say, while I’m down there, I pick up a lot of new slang that these hapless city bureaucrats could only dream of compiling.
Here’s my latest top 10 that all the kids be sayin’ these dayz, for realz:
1. Space Queer - Chump, loser, best friend.
2. Smelly Celly - Cell phone that’s been jammed up one’s ass.
3. Fart Jar - Well, it’s a fart jar.
4. Tickle Pickle - Your dick, his dick.
5. Fecal - Paris Hilton. Of high quality; pleasing to look at.
6. Droopers - Flat tits, ball sacks, faces.
7. Hamburger - Ass meat, food.
8. Dick Worms - Dicks inside dicks.
9. Over-The-Shoulder-Boulder-Holder-Soldier - Girl who bravely jogs despite her 36DD’s.
10. Where My Dad Takes A Dump - One’s crib, home.
OK, now. Peace off, my space queers!!
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I have a slang word for you
urps……….purple weed
sauce…….any kind of style
Ill hit you back with more…… peace out.
I’m so thankful not to live in the US!
schrumtralecent….Ax Farrell wut da fack dat dir iz
If English were a shirt, slang would represent the tie-dye process.
Paris Hilton sex tape uncut…
In late 2003, clips of the Paris Hilton sex tape video were leaked into the World Wide Web….